It took me lots of lessons before I learnt that compromising my believes, values and morals about some certain things in life in other to make other people comfortable would always back fire and spiral me into unending hurt and bitterness.
I am an empath and I get burdened with people’s burden and just feel a natural knack to lift it off them.
I could do anything to make people feel better, and I expected everyone to be like this towards me.
I mean, you go out of your way for people , you help them achieve that which they are in pursuit of, and when you expect the same measure doled out to you, you realise you are solitary and very alone.
You suddenly realise rapture has taken place around you and you can’t even find a single soul to offer just a word of encouragement, the ones that are magnanimous enough only has “it is well o” for you, offered in a way that would make you feel as if your life is under a siege, and that you are about to be ruined. ( Recently my husband told me that anyone that he manages to open up to about whatever might be bothering him, and the person only says it is well o in return, he would immediately know that person has been sent to compound his issues, I laughed and laughed and realized that “it is well” has been barstardised and misused by people, rather than be a faith filled and comforting word, it has become a word of resignation to fate, a word said in other to shut you up from recounting whatever might be bothering you) Is that feeling familiar?
Yes I have been there, and I would get so agitated and pained and even get angry and lash out at this people I expected so much from in my own time of need. After all to whom much is given much is expected.
Hello? My friend, the truth is some of this people don’t care, they only care about what they can get from you and how they can use you to achieve their aims and desires, once that is fulfilled you would be royally dumped and left alone in bewilderment.
Some of this people, after they have gotten what they needed from you or through you, begins to avoid you and begins to see you as an enemy of progress, a would be monitoring spirit who might want to keep a tab on them and their achievements. 
(this is the height of it all, not good enough my friend).
They would forget how much discomfort you went through for you to render your assistance when they needed it most, some wouldn’t even care about the compromise you had to make, lies you had to tell that took a whole lots of your energy, embarrassment you had to bear just to make them feel comfortable, explanations you had to make that sapped the whole lots of your strength, the list is endless.
It was when I learnt to be of help to people and not compromise my believes and values in the process that I began to have more peace and became less offended at people’s display of deliberate amnesia of the good you once rendered, I had no feeling of bitterness towards anyone again.
Nowadays I just do my bit without compromising my values and move on afterwards without expecting you to be grateful or even remember.
I had better relationships with people, life became easier and more amusing at the weirdness of the people who act this way, I realized that they are unique and their make up is what makes the world hilarious through my magnifying glass.
Friends, make your lives easier and devoid of bitterness by not compromising your values and morals to please anyone.
Have a beautiful and fulfilling week ahead.
N.B that Obama meme was created by OOA of Musings and thoughts, if you want to use it, biko (please) come and pay royalty hehehe see how body is catching me fa( I am excited) if you are wondering why I am excited over an ordinary meme creation please read THIS you would understand why I am feeling like a guru LOL.
Written by OOA of musings and thoughts
Have you subscribed to our newsletter? Please do so at the bottom of the page in just 30 secs so you can get our various encouraging posts delivered right to your inbox without missing out on anything.
Images 1 and 3 culled from seanwes.com and dennyzen.com respectively.
3 Responses
it happens to me a lot.but i have made up my mind not to go out of my way to please people again. they dont care about u. human nature is selfish. ve also learnt how to take my time in saying yes or no to people cos long after saying yes i will be blaming myself for not saying no earlier. i appreciate your post
I am happy you have decided to redefine your stance. It gives one so much peace. Thanks so much sis.
Your place is valueble for me. Thanks!…